Jose Cuervo is the Paris Hilton of the Tequila world. When you go out with it, you just know that you are going to look and act slutty. You will be slurring your words, making out with random strangers, and maybe waking up with no memory of why you have dollar bills in your pants. You just feel like you were involved in a wild party. And guess what, that’s hot.
The mineral-rich volcanic soil of Jalisco is the ideal place to grow the blue agave plant, from which all Jose Cuervo Tequila is made. The blue agave plant is nurtured and cultivated by experts known as Jimadors. The pinas are transported to “Destileria La Rojena” and those that meet Cuervo’s high standards are selected for cooking. The agaves are cooked in adobe clay ovens at temperatures reaching 900 degrees Fahrenheit. The tequila’s color comes from being aged in wooden barrels. Every bottle of Jose Cuervo reads: “Hecho en Mexico” to remind everyone that the tequila enjoyed around the world is the pride of Mexico.
When I drink Jose Cuervo Especial, it’s not like drinking most other liquors. There isn’t a fine woody barrel taste or a blend of different exotic fruits and berries. And your tongue isn’t rushed with all types of great distinct flavors. Nope. Not Jose. It just tastes like tequila. I know what you’re thinking, “but Jose is tequila.” What I mean is, Jose tastes like tequila without anything extra or special done to it. It just tastes like tequila. Or at least what I think raw tequila should taste like.
Just as if you were a girl going bar hopping with Paris Hilton, you don’t want anyone to know that you are feeling like a dirty girl. But let’s be honest. When you get drunk off Jose Cuervo Especial you do not want people to be able to notice, but when you start to notice the line for your free lap dances is getting longer than the line to get in the club, there’s no hiding it. For those of you who haven’t caught on yet, this stuff will get you drunk. You will be on your way to dry heaving the morning away in no time. The $20 price tag is great for 750ml of spring break in a bottle. And at that price, why not get two?
So go out and buy a bottle of Jose Cuervo and feel like a short skirted slutty rock star for a night. Just beware of the next morning. It won’t be cute, but the stories might be. And that’s hot.
Also check out our reviews of 1800 Reposado and Jose Black Medallion.
Shootability – 5.5
Mixability – 6.5
Drunkability – 7.5
Hangover-ability – 3.0
Bang for the Buck – 7.0
Chick-appeal – 6.0
Overall – 5.5 
Comments
i’m drinking this right now….and loving it.
I was born with this runnin through my veins and it hasn’t stopped yet!
I just got myself a bottle of it for tonight. 375ml for 20.45 Canadian why not, also got a strawberry tequila mixed case and a heineken beer. I usally don’t drink tequila but when I do sometimes I love it and sometimes it can fuck off it;’s gross butI wanna get fucked up tonght and outa no were feelt like tequila so why the fuck not. Rock on folks but stay safe and don’t get to fucked up LOL peace!
this stuff made me sooo sick its not even funny, it seriously raped me. never again….
i don’t get why people are claiming this stuff is rough. its smooth as hell, and tastes very pleasing.
punjabi- agreed man.
Very smooth. I am not a big Tequila guy but could always tolerate it. All I ever really had tried was Sauza. This stuff I though blew it away. I really was surprised at how much nicer it was to drink. Just smoother.
Again- not a tequila expert but regarding ease of shooting:
2 thumbs up from me, baby.
This is the only thing I drink….. Best shit on the planet!
drink any tequila but this and they call it top shelf its the worst for the name it gets. these use to be 3 year ago a agreat tequila call tres something. patron made it but it was cannabilizing all their sales it was 20 buck for 1000 ml and it made Jose taste like filter alcohol from a russsian whores panties.
if it says jose just find somethign else IMHO
A merry heart goes all the way
Worst crap ever bottled. Anybody who “enjoys” this drink has NEVER tried a real quality Tequila. Get real…you can’t even make a decent mix with Jose! I hear people talk about loving Jose until I give them a real quality Tequila, and not one person has ever gone back to Jose after trying a good tequila. This is for weekend drunks looking for a cheap buzz (probably the same people who swear by PGA), but its not for anyone who acually enjoys tequila! Get mad or get the goods! As for the last comment, I think filtering it through a Russian whore’s panties would only improve it. It couldn’t get any worse!
Great neat and also makes a superb margerita. Fantastico!
I started on Patron, which was good, so I decided to try some jose. Let me tell you that this shit tastes like fucking yak. It’s disgusting.
I only have one thing to say to all the people that say Jose is worse then the Tequila they’ve had…….What Tequila is better? Don’t just say you’ve had better stuff. Actually give us names of this better Tequila so that we might imbibe the “Alcohol of the Gods”
Don Julio Blanco Silky smooth, no harsh aftertase,great in mixed drinks or straight up shots. I got turned on to it on a trip to Huatulco, Mx this past winter, we were drinking “Paloma’s” a refreshing, thirst quenching tequila cocktail made with Don Julio Blanco all week,,,,it’s a favorite in Mexico
Ingredients:
2 oz blanco or reposado tequila
6 oz fresh grapefruit soda
1/2 oz lime juice
salt for rimming (optional)
Preparation:
Rim a collins glass with salt.
Fill the glass with ice and add the tequila and lime juice.
Top it off with grapefruit soda.
Won a bottle of Jose at a Golf Tourney this past weekend, so I’ll see what that’s like soon enough.
Cheers
very nice site….
Taste is subjective, but lets be honest. Cuervo Especial (Gold) isn’t what I would call a “good” Tequila. I’ve had some “acceptable” Margaritas made with Jose Cuervo Gold given the right combination of ingredients, but people need to keep in mind that Cuervo Gold is a “mixto” Tequila which means it can contain up to 49% of it’s alcohol content made from stuff OTHER THAN Blue Agave-derived sugars (cheaper ingredients). Furthermore, the gold color of that stuff comes from caramel color added in. You want real Tequila flavor? Just get a decent 100% Agave bottle of any one of 100 different premium brands out there nowadays, and go for the “silver”, “blanco” or “Plata” type, which is not aged, and as raw and real as Tequila gets. You want smooth oak barrel-aged stuff, then get the Reposado, or Anejo. The gold color on those comes from the oak it rests in, not caramel color additives. I won’t slam people for liking Cuervo Especial, after all people like what they like, and if Cuervo Gold tickles your taste buds, then more power to ya. Just give the 100% Agave stuff a try.
First off, tequila really isn’t my favorite liquor – that honor belongs firmly to bourbon. That said, I occasionally like margaritas. While Cuervo Especial works, I have to agree with those that argue for 100% agave tequila. If nothing else, it bothers me that mixtos are essentially the same as a blended whiskey in that they’re only a certain percentage of the actual liquor they’re supposed to be. I don’t drink Kentucky Deluxe unless I’m pretty hard up, and I’ve sworn myself away from mixtos unless there’s a good reason.
Again, I’m not a tequila expert, but some friends and I tried Lunazul blanco in margaritas recently and I thought I could tell a difference. It’s distributed by Heaven Hill, which made me a little wary, but I enjoyed it more than the Cuervo I’ve had. Even better, Lunazul is around the same price as Cuervo and it seems worth it. The guy at the liquor store recommended El Jimador [(also supposed to be 100% agave) but I haven’t tried it. Perhaps we could have a Boozebasher or user review of Lunazul or El Jimador sometime?
Thanks for all you guys do.
Unless you’re drinking traditional or reserva de familia, cuervo is pretty much crap. Everything I look at the bottle I’m reminded why tequila gets a bad name, get some real tequila like milagro, partida or hornitos and if you really don’t want to spend money at least el jimador is about 20 times better than this crap.
Unfortunately, I lose weight, do not drink
Cuervo Gold? Are you kidding me? And you call yourself connoisseur of tequila? I would never serve this crap to anyone I know. I like sipping tequila and which ones are better, here’s a list. Don Julio Añejo (my personal favorite), Patròn Añejo, Tres Generaciones, Espolon Añejo – all vastly superior tequilas. All sipping tequilas. You want great tequila for the buck? Hornitos reposado. For $10 than Cuervo, it’s incredibly good. Want to make margaritas? Use Blanco, and may I suggest El Jimador?
Cuervo Gold is not made of 100% agave. All the other tequilas listed above are. Cheers, and remember to try a sipping one at least once in your life.
I drank a bottle of the silver after I broke up with my gf. Never again I almost got arrested and puked on 3 ppl. I just do t trust Jose anymore
Why does Sauza taste & smell like beer? I thought this was supposed to be a better quality of tequila (or someone told me).
I’m drinking and you want me to read AND write the words in one of those security picture things?? Anyway, I can’t find any Peruvian pisco, so I’m not getting piscoed, and I still can’t find my favourite Hungarian zwack, thus I’m not getting ZWACKED… therefore it’s just me and Jose tonight… I’m getting JOSED!
Second night running that I drink with Jose and I can heartily recommend tequila and Sicilian lemon soda. Call it a Zappa!
At least they make those security word things simple…
Okay, out of mix for making Zappas, went next door to the grocery store and found a litre of mango juice, so tonight it’s MANGO MADNESS!!!
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