Scoresby Very Rare Blended Scotch Whiskey is imported from Scotland and bottled by United Distillers in Stamford, Connecticut. Scoresby is a blend of selected light-bodied whiskies that are aged 36 months. It is advertised as having a mellow taste that will “please the exacting taste of the connoisseur.” You may ask, “how can they possibly sell this stuff for such an affordable price?” The first oddity I noticed was the fact that they call Scoresby “very rare”, but there are about 15 bottles of the stuff on the shelf. Something isn’t right here. I personally think that all “very rare” liquor should be sold exclusively in the glass case of your local liquor store and not on the bottom shelf. I would fully expect to be forced to miss a car payment if I were to purchase said rare liquor. Another indicator of the cheapness of this blend is the fact that the aging time is measured in months and not years. This is a big red flag in the mind of a Scotch drinker. Ideally, I want my Scotch, like my women, to be somewhere in the neighborhood of 18 to 25 years old (16-25 in some countries). That’s what makes a truly happy Scotch drinker.
Scoresby Scotch will certainly not slap you in the face nor overpower you when sipping it, but it definitely leaves a great deal to be desired in the taste department. You can tell that this stuff hasn’t been aged very long because it doesn’t possess a deep, barrel taste. I’m not sure what kind of barrel is used during the aging process, and I certainly can’t ascertain that from its taste. Scoresby tastes very dirty for a Scotch, and I don’t mean rich and peaty. It tastes like some sort of filthy animal took a dog-paddle in the barrel and spoiled the liquor before bottling. It’s a very flat and almost sour taste. I definitely don’t have an expert’s trained palate, but I am hard-pressed to pick out any kind of botanical or infused flavor in this spirit. The sourness diminishes in the aftertaste, but Scoresby leaves you with an unpleasant and unclean taste on your tongue. The only thing that really keeps this spirit consumable is that it goes down pretty smoothly and easily, and after awhile your tongue becomes numb to the filthy aftertaste.
Although Scoresby was a travesty of a Scotch when it came to sipping, it really packed an excellent punch. It gave me an excellent, almost sloppy buzz. I believe I was slurring my speech a bit after consuming four glasses, and it gave me a very calm and oblivious feeling. That oblivious feeling is exactly what I look for a liquor to give me after a hard day at work. However, I would be careful not to consume too much of this stuff on a work night because it left me with a decent headache and a general sense of grogginess the next day that stayed with me for a couple hours. I could still taste that filthy animal water on my tongue; it nearly made me curse the liquor gods for bringing me this stuff. Luckily, I remembered all the pleasant beverages the liquor gods had bestowed upon me in past experiences before forsaking them. In short, it was definitely more of a hangover than I am used to receiving from a good Scotch.
At $12 for 750mL, Scoresby Scotch will barely even put a dent in your wallet, but if I were in the market for a Scotch, I would go ahead and invest a little more green to the liquor fund to purchase a tastier beverage. If you don’t care much about a pleasant taste from your Scotch, and you want something to just throw back every now and then to relax, Scoresby may be just the thing for you. However, I recommend steering clear of this dirty little Scotch.
Sipability - 3.5
Mixability - N/A
Drunkability - 8.0
Hangover-ability - 5.0
Bang for the Buck - 9.0
Overall - 5.0 
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Comments
Wait a minute… I thought Hunter liked 12 year old scotch…
You sick bastard.
Rare also means “raw”
If this is a blend of light-bodied Scotch whiskies that are aged for 3 years, then “very rare” is certainly a correct term. It is very immature, if it is only aged for 3 years… which would be a characteristic of the cheap stuff.
I don’t know how this stuff tastes, probably like shit, because I will not buy a bottle of Scotch that is younger than 10 years - even then, I prefer 14 or higher in age.
If I do have to go for the blended, either Johnny Walker or Dewar’s… not this stuff.
As a drink? Shamefully nasty.
As a cooking agent? Believe it or not, excellent.
Swim a shot of this with apple pie ala-mode on the plate, and you have a nice dessert.
Marinate pork chops with it, some lemon, a touch of brown sugar and garlic. Takes about 4-6 hours.
Baste a turkey with it. I swear, it’s excellent. Pour a half bottle in the tray and baste every half-hour. Add to your existing turkey recipe.
Try it with frosted flakes instead of milk. Okay, don’t, but throw a shot of it in with something that requires a sweet nose but not a sweet tongue, and you’ll be pleased to have it sitting next to your vinegar if not your good Scotch.
You can tell I couldn’t bear to throw it out, but it got used. Never tell idiots you like Scotch if you have a birthday or as the holidays approach. The first time, they’ll give you a bottle of Black Velvet and then when you sneer, ask, “…well it’s whiskey, what’s the difference?” The second time you get Scoresby, and at that point, you give up because you can’t be too much of an asshole. Well you could, but then you use it to cook and serve your tasteless guests. That will show them. Too bad they complimented me as my plan backfired, and to my chagrin, they were right.
KW
I never thought to cook with it. I did manage to drink the whole bottle already though. I seriously doubt I’ll ever buy the stuff again. Kudos to you for creativity.
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