Okay, I can admit it, I have a bit of a problem.  It turns out that I am a little bit of a liquor snob, especially with Scotches and the single malt varieties.  I have a very difficult time walking out of a liquor store with a blended Scotch when I know that there are a number of delicious single malts calling my name from the shelf.  However, I managed to summon some will power and purchased a box, containing a bottle, containing the finest Scots Whisky.  Well at least that is what Berry Bros & Rudd, the makers of Cutty Sark, claim. 

    Cutty Sark was created on the 20th of March, 1923.  This Scotch was the brainchild of the Berry Bros., a wine and spirit merchant that was established in 1698.  Senior partner Francis Berry insisted on blending only the finest malt whiskies and each of those whiskies should be naturally light in color.  The resulting product consisted of about 20 different single malt whiskies, mostly from the Speyside region of Scotland, and high-quality grain whiskies.  The individual whiskies are matured in American Oak barrels before blending.  After blending, the mix is aged together for another 6 months creating the final product you can purchase for about $22.

    The name “Cutty Sark” was suggested by famous Scottish artist James McBey when he was invited to a luncheon with the partners of Berry Bros.  It is named after the world’s last tea clipper, the Cutty Sark.  This seems appropriate because the ship was used to ship fine Scottish whisky around the world.  Oh wait, actually it was used for shipping tea in between China and London.  Later, it was also used in the Australian wool trade.  Maybe the artist was really just obsessed with the undergarment bearing the name cutty sark, often worn by women in the 18th century?  Actually, drinking Scotch named after undergarments is a bit awkward, so we’ll just stick to the ship story.  The Cutty Sark clipper is still around today and you can actually visit it if you happen to be in Greenwich.  Unfortunately, in May of 2007, the Cutty Sark sustained extensive damage from a fire, so it is currently under repairs and restoration.  Honestly though, if you are reading this site you probably don’t care about the ship anyway.  You care about the Scotch, so lets get on with it.

    We cracked open the bottle, took a wiff, and then immediately wished we had not.  It has a nice initial oakey aroma, but it was followed by what can only be described as fresh vomit.  We poured it over some ice and could not help but notice Cutty Sark’s incredibly light, pale-gold color.  The first sip was a bit harsh.  It warms the mouth and throat the same way a branding iron warms a cow’s hide.  Surprisingly, after a few sips it smoothed out and went down relatively easily.  Now the flavor of Cutty Sark is where we run into a big problem.  As I have mentioned before, I enjoy liquors that can stand on their own in terms of flavor and complexity.  Cutty Sark has a very light flavor, and by light, I mean virtually nonexistent.  There is a nice oak flavor, but it vanishes so quickly it’s hard to enjoy.  There really isn’t a finish to speak of, other than a slight bitterness.  I suspect that the 20 single malts in this bottle spent very little time in barrels.  There is not even a hint of the smokey and peaty flavors that you expect from Scotch.  It tastes more like some oak sawdust was dumped into a vat of young Scotch, stirred it around for a bit, and then filtered to remove the chunks of wood.  Basically, the BoozeBasher staff does not understand the purpose of scotch without flavor, and as such, we could not give it a very high rating.

    Cuty Sark is an 80-proof liquor, but it didn’t give me an 80-proof buzz.  I really was expecting a little more out of this Scotch in the drunk department.  The good news is that I felt fine the next morning.  I could tell I had a few drinks the previous night, but there were no real ill effects.  Cutty Sark, to me, is a watered-down version of a Scotch.  The color, flavor, and drunkability are all significantly less than you would expect.  If you are a vodka drinker trying to get into whiskies, then Cutty Sark might be a good transitional liquor.  However, if you are a Scotch or whiskey drinker, I suggest you spend your money elsewhere.

Sipability - 4.5

Mixability - N/A

Drunkability -6.0

Hangover-ability - 7.5

Bang for the Buck - 8.0

Overall - 5.5 

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     The Speyside 12-year is produced on the banks of the River Tromie in the Speyside region of the Scottish Highlands.  The Speyside Distillery is still independently owned and family-run, allowing them to ensure consistent quality.  The Speyside Distillery is also among the smallest distilleries in Scotland and is located closer to the source of the River Spey than any other distillery, providing access to the area’s purest water.  The 12-year is made from the local waters of the River Tromie and the fine barley from the Moray Firth region giving it a taste of both the land and the river.  They seem to take pride in their Scotch, so let’s find out how it really tastes.

     When popping the little cork from the bottle of The Speyside 12-year and taking a whiff, you are hit with an earthy aroma of toasted barley that is almost reminiscent of the smell of coffee and caramel.  It’s quite a unique smell for Scotch.  After it hits the ice, the malt opens up nicely and yields a more traditional Scotch smell with heavy overtones of the coffee scent.  The nose is very unique, but on the other hand, the taste of The Speyside is nothing too spectacular.  It goes down very smooth with somewhat of a hazelnut taste.  This slight hazelnut taste gives way to the very earthy taste of the roasted barley.  It’s a deep and rich taste, but there don’t seem to be too many complexities in the flavor.  The finish is somewhat abrupt and dry, but it does give you a satisfied feeling after a sip.  Compared to some other single malts, the taste of The Speyside 12 seems almost bland and a little unimpressive.  There isn’t really a complex boquet of flavors to nitpick, but it’s smoothness and earthy taste could very well be a big draw for some Scotch drinkers. 

      Although the buzz I obtained from The Speyside 12 may not have been enough to convince me that I needed to remove my pants because they were holding me back (the buzz I got from The Glenlivet Nàdurra certainly did), I did acheived a moderate drunk during my sampling.  It wasn’t really a relaxed and down-tempo drunk, and it made my taste buds yearn for more drink.  Some may consider that a bad thing, but I found it to be rather nice.  Like most heavy drinkers, I enjoy mixing my liquors throughout the night, and any Scotch that seems welcoming to the idea gets a small boost in opinion from me.  The Speyside’s liquor-friendliness makes me view this Scotch as more of a Scotch to drink when planning to start a long evening of debauchery rather than a night of relaxation at home.  The buzz will give you a good start to the night, and your body will readily welcome other friendly beverages.  Soon, you may find yourself out on the town, destined to an evening filled with fuzzy memories that you can embellish in your own mind to make you feel special.  Of course, this apparent liquor friendliness and playfulness does not come without a price.

     The next morning was pretty much hell on me.  Scratch that; the next day was pretty much hell for me.  I stumbled into work the next morning feeling rather exhausted and extremely sick to my stomach.  I choked down a sports drink and later a milkshake (I didn’t have to get the cookies ’n’ cream one, but I did anyway) to try to rid my body of the ravaging poisons from the night before, but all was for naught.  To put it crassly, The Speyside 12 kicked my ass.  I felt I should curl up in the fetal position and cry to the liquor gods, begging them to protect me from the evils of daylight, loud noises, and office work.  I actually sprinted to the bathroom on a couple different occassions, even late in the day, expecting it to be the big one.  Fortunately for me and everyone else who might have been in the restroom at work, I managed to keep it all down.  This is not a beverage for the weak of stomach, and I would not reccommend drinking much of it on a work night. 

     Although it isn’t the easiest Scotch to find, The Speyside 12 is rather cheap for a single malt.  You should be able to find a bottle at a local liquor store for around $31.  For that price, you may very well be able to afford to stock it at home.  The overall quality of the Scotch is a great bargain at that price point, and it’s an awesome value for a night of fun.  I haven’t had many Scotches in this price range that are as drinkable as this one.  So if you are looking for an affordable single malt experience and you don’t have to work early the next morning…or at all the next day, give The Speyside 12 a try.

Sipability - 6.0

Mixability - N/A

Drunkability - 7.0

Hangover-ability - 4.0

Bang for the Buck - 8.0

Overall - 6.0  

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     Oban 14-year is produced in a small town called Oban in Argyll.  It’s located just inside the shores of Lorn near a span of cliffs and natural caves that are said to be the sheltering place of the original settlers of the mainland around 5,000 B.C.  The small town of Oban actually grew up around the distillery after its construction in 1794.  The distillery only has two pot stills, making it one of Scotland’s smallest.  In production since 1988, the 14-year single malt Scotch is the distillery’s flagship product and is one of only two remaining Western Highland malts.  I appreciate their focus, and I would actually consider moving to the town just to be closer to the magical place where this liquor is born and aged.

     Oban 14-year comes in a very attractive case and bottle.  The cylindrical case depicts the rocky cliffs that are the backdrop to the town of Oban, and the bottle exudes a simple, yet regal look.  The Scotch itself is of a rich golden color that lightens to a near-yellow hue when poured on the rocks.  Its aroma is rather light and extremely pleasant.  Oban 14-year smells like a fine oak barrel that has been dipped in the sweetest of sweet milk chocolate and then garnished with fresh fruit.  The smell alone is enough to nearly bring tears of joy to my eyes. 

     Oban is silky-smooth to sip.  This malt goes down extremely smooth and gives you a wonderful warming sensation back up your esophagus and into your mouth.  The taste is soft and somewhat fruity, and the finish leaves you with a peaty taste in your mouth after the warming sensation subsides.  That peaty aftertaste leaves you very satisfied and at ease.  The taste of the malt is not extremely complex, which may disappoint those Scotch drinkers that enjoy dissecting complex infusions while sipping, but the experience of drinking Oban is truly remarkable.  I have never enjoyed a Scotch quite as much as Oban 14-year.  The exquisite smoothness and impressive warming sensation of this Scotch make it top-notch in my book.  I would drink a glass of this stuff every night for dessert if my wallet would allow it. 

     At 86-proof, you would expect Oban to give you a nice buzz, but it really exceeds those expectations.  Don’t let the smoothness fool you.  After a few glasses, I was swaying to my own rhythm in my chair and enjoying the hell out of watching Megan Fox show her goods in Transformers.  I suppose the movie was pretty good, but my focus was too much on her to really give an honest and fair review (this is a liquor site anyway, not a movie site).  I’m sure Megan, that’s what I call her, would really appreciate my taste in liquor and movies.  I’m sure we would get along very well and be the best couple on earth.  I love her, and that’s all that really matters.  Now, back to business.  The Oban buzz was a very light one.  I wasn’t really slurring words or anything, but I felt really in-tune with my surroundings and at peace with everything.  It was a very relaxing experience, but I was very much ready to take it to the streets and local bars.       

     Another bright spot to Oban 14-year is the fact that it really left me with no hangover.  I had a case of dry-mouth in the morning, but after drinking a couple glasses of water, I felt like a million bucks.  I might have poured another glass of Oban, but I wanted to save it for a special occassion…such as writing this review. 

     The only drawback to Oban 14-year is the price.  At around $77, it will hurt your wallet pretty badly.  However, when you consider that the cramped nature of the area around the distillery severely limits production, the price doesn’t seem too steep.  I have consumed Scotches that cost four times the price of Oban that really don’t hold a candle to its unique sipping experience.  It’s worth noting that the bottle we used in the review process was an especially tasty bottle.  I have purchased a handful of bottles of Oban 14-year in the past, but none of them have tasted quite like this bottle.  They all have been worth the price of admission, but this bottle is something special.  That’s the nature of single-barrel Scotches; every bottle tastes different.  All things considered, Oban 14-year is one of the single best liquors that has ever found its way into my welcoming belly.  Even if you are not much of a Scotch drinker, do yourself a favor, and pick up a bottle of Oban 14-year for a special occasion.  Maybe I’ll send Megan a bottle; she just may love me for it.  

Sipability - 9.5

Mixability - N/A

Drunkability - 8.5

Hangover-ability - 9.0

Bang for the Buck - 7.0

Overall - 9.0 

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